The Smudge

In the corner, sits a smudge
It’s been mocking me
And will not budge

I try to erase it, with no such luck
It lives on my paper
Running a muck

I try to cover it, with illustrations a glow
But it’s there underneath
All the colors in tow

For it lives on my paper, forever a smudge
Bothering me greatly
With its hiss and grudge

I want it go, as it steadies its stare
Silently mocking my words
With nothing more but a glare

On and on, into the night
My smudge remains
And continues it’s blight

Then I realized, why it won’t leave
It’s because my dear friends
The smudge is me

– C.A. Sullivan

All Dressed Up with Nothing to Say

Writing is really difficult when I feel like I have nothing to say. Most of the time I’ve got an opinion or a thought and just want to share it because I feel strongly about it or because I feel like others could benefit or relate to it.

Other times, I feel like I do today. I have nothing to say that’s important so I’m sitting here staring at my laptop screen. With everything that’s going on in the world, my voice feels so small and insignificant. What could I possibly have to say that’s going to make a difference or that people will even care about for that matter.

The truth is, I don’t know. I just have to create what I create because it’s what I love and hope someone cares about it. Often, I feel as though you either need to have a unique enough voice to be heard or you need to stand with other people who are saying the same thing to be heard.

If I try to write about something that I think other people want to read or care about, I lose interest or my writing comes across as insincere, 100 percent of the time.

I create because I want to. I create what makes me happy. I create what I’m passionate about. If I were to start creating for others instead of myself, I would certainly lose my authenticity and passion for what I do. It may not always be the best writing or something that anyone cares about, but it came from an honest place.

Even if it that means all I did was write this really boring post.

– C.A. Sullivan

Writer’s Block

These blank pages intimidate me.
Why can’t I write on them?
I touch the pages
Turn on some music
Light a candle
In hopes it will inspire me
To write something profound
But the empty page
Only stares back at me
I go weeks without writing
And when I finally can put words to the page
There aren’t many of them
My dream is to write a book
But at this rate
It will be merely be a collection
Of random thoughts
Captured throughout my life
Mostly in times of pain or struggle
Because those are the times
My feelings are strongest
Maybe it’s not that I’m no good at writing,
It’s that I don’t put enough time into making it something more.

– C.A. Sullivan


I walked through the tomato garden with my Poppy after the fresh rain. The smell of wet earth hung in the air. Bright green vines hung from the plants. My shoes sunk in the moist soil with each step. We walked together as he spoke to me about the tomatoes. I plucked one from the vine and bit into it’s juicy red skin enjoying it’s sweet flavor. Mrs. Pine’s German Shepherd was nearby. My Poppy was house sitting for Mrs. Pine while she way away. He always took me on adventure’s there. Her house was like a castle, filled with rooms to explore.

Inside, it was like a scene out of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. As I explored each room, I expected to find the magic wardrobe, but never did. The house library was magical though. My Poppy used to read there. Books of every kind lined the walls. A latter extended up one wall so that you could reach. It smelled like book paper, bindings and old cigarettes. A huge desk sat in the middle of the room. It was full of papers, books and trinkets. Poppy sat in the chair and read as I continued to explore.

I often wondered what he read that kept him so interested. I longed to write stories that kept people’s attention the way books kept his. We spent a lot of time together reading, playing board games and exploring the public library. It was his love of books that inspired me to write. Writing reminds me of his love and the time we spent together.

A Weekend Adventure to Wonderland

Alice in Wonderland

We went to Jim Thorpe, PA over the weekend to walk around and go shopping. Yes, shopping! IN STORES! It was the first time I had been shopping in a store that didn’t sell groceries in 4 months since COVID started. Jim Thorpe is this adorable historic town with shops, museums and train ride scenic tours. Unfortunately, the museums were still closed and the train tour wasn’t running but most of the shops and restaurants were open.

The shops carry all sorts of items from homemade soaps and new age items to antiques and books to handmade crafts, mead and wine. One of the shops, BeeStung, had character/movie themed items like jewelry, boxes, bottles and other tchotchkes that were made by the shop owner.

I couldn’t resist all the Alice in Wonderland themed stuff! I love different versions of the story and have quite a few renditions already from novels to graphic novels to pop up books! This was the perfect opportunity to buy props for photos for my bookstagram account.

With loot in hand and plenty of Alice in Wonderland books at home, I was ready and excited, to set up my displays. Check out my photo shoot from this weekend.

For those of you who don’t know, Bookstagram is a community on Instagram that shares photos of all things books! There’s also a lot of writers and authors that are part of the community. Not only are the photos people share amazing but the community is really supportive.

I started my Bookstagram account kind of by accident. I wanted a place where I could share short quotes and writings that weren’t in a long blog format.

I started by sharing a few posts that included my writings on backgrounds that I made with an app. Then, I realized that I have this awesome secretary desk and vintage books that I could take photos of and pair them with my writings. So I took a bunch of pictures one day and started sharing them on Instagram with short passages I had written.

I don’t know how, but I stumbled across these other accounts who shared photos of books. Not just books, but entire libraries of books. Shelves and shelves of books and bookish items. I instantly fell in love with all the beautiful book aesthetics!

I realized that I could do something similar but combine my writing and marketing knowledge with it. Now I share photos of books, journals, my writings and marketing tips.

I actually took a photo of one of my journals, open, so that I could use one of my editing apps to write my passages on it for posts. I hope to gain more followers, but in the meantime it’s just been really fun to set up the photo shoots and share my thoughts with a like minded community.

C.A. Sullivan

Writing, Routine and Poor Grammar

Art of Writing Box

Is the art of letter writing dead? It certainly must be unique if we refer to it as an art, when once it was the only way to communicate. It takes time to craft a sentence that is moving. A phrase that has true meaning and depth. There’s something about putting a pencil to a piece of paper that connects you to a deeper sense of yourself and with your own thoughts.

In an age where we create things to be better, faster and more efficient all with the goal of saving time so we can have more time, it seems as though we have sacrificed something greater to get to where we are going. And where are we going? It just seems like we’re going faster than ever more consciousness of time but less consciousness of each memory in it.

As each day passes feeling more and more like a routine… Weeks pass, months pass, years pass. You look back and realize you lived every day of it, but were you a conscious player in the making of your own memories? Were you practicing mindfulness? Or were you just moving through each day to get to the next? We move through life so quickly because if it’s faster it’s better, so we can move on to the next best thing that’s even faster and better than the last. So I just put my pencil to my piece of paper and breath.

C.A. Sullivan



I was sifting through my computer files looking for documents and other stuff I could delete and came across this gem. I had this idea last year to write a book out of the collections of thoughts, stories and journal entries I’ve written over the years. Okay, I had this idea multiple times over the course of the last 15 years but last year I decided it was going to be called Unicorn Tears: A Collection of Short Stories and Poems. I never forgot about it, I just keep writing and collecting my writings. But, I did forget about this forward I wrote for it. Enjoy.

You may have picked up this book thinking it was about Unicorns.  Unfortunately, you are mistaken. In these pages lies the story of transformation. A metaphorical transformation from ordinary to magical, from girl to unicorn. You’ll find heart break, grief, anguish, self-hatred, anger, and struggle. All of the necessary ingredients for true transformation.  

I’ve found something here, something in the pain and struggle. I can only describe it as becoming a Unicorn.  If you have gone through transformation you may know what I mean. 

C.A. Sullivan

Create For Yourself

Squirrel and Books

For whatever reason, it took me so many years to figure out that I didn’t have to create something for other people, I could simply do it for myself and if other people didn’t like it then it really doesn’t matter because I enjoyed creating it. Here I am, 34, and finally realizing this, like it was novel idea.

In a world where everyone is claiming to be real and posting about their every experience on social platforms, how do u find authenticity? How do you be authentic? The truth is, you shouldn’t have to try to be authentic. Chances are, if you’re trying to be authentic, you’re not. Or at least you’re not coming across that way.

But there is an answer to this. And I found it in the words of my favorite writer, Elizabeth Gilbert. Create for yourself. Whatever you create, be it a novel, a painting, a new invention…create it for nothing more than your own pleasure and everything else will fall into place. Stop over thinking it and stop trying to force it. Do what you love and what feels and comes natural to you. It’s in this spirit of freedom that we can truly become authentic. Anything else is simply not who we were meant to be.

– C.A. Sullivan